Just a few days after Thanksgiving, he was given a death sentence. Doctors told Adam Gaspar, my friend since the first grade
and a 41-year-old father of six ages 21 to 10, he has a glioblastoma multiforme — a grade IV malignant brain tumor. In early
December, a surgeon removed 80% of a "daughter" tumor in Adam's cerebellum, but it was too risky to remove the rest or to
touch the primary tumor invading his brain stem.
Adam Gaspar and I have been friends since the first grade, but we're closer now than ever before.
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Adam's waging a war for his life — and his family. He's starving the tumors of sugars and combating the cancer with vitamin
therapy. He also has undergone a rigorous radiation and chemotherapy regimen.
Forever friends
I'll never forget the day I became friends with Adam. It was show-and-tell day, and my mom had asked me to tell a whopper.
As I stood before my fellow first-graders holding one of my dad's boots, I told them the legendary lumberjack Paul Bunyan
had stopped by our house and forgotten his footwear. I shared a few tales of Bunyan, the classic big man, who American folklore purports being of such gargantuan size and titanic
strength that he and his big blue ox Babe plowed the Grand Canyon. I sold my mom's story the best I could, but before I could
take my seat, Adam called my bluff.
"That can't be Paul Bunyan's boot. My dad's shoes are bigger than that," Adam argued.
I was not pleased with this naysayer, but what was I to do? I was the smallest kid in the class, and Adam was the tallest.
Realizing I couldn't beat him, I joined him. That was 35 years ago.
Standing taller than ever
As fate would have it, Adam has become my — and many others' — real Paul Bunyan. Adam stands 6-ft. 8-in. and has helped create
a few worldly wonders of his own — the most towering being the unshakable love he shares with his wife, Ann, and their little
giants Nick, Monika and Gabi (my goddaughters), Juli, Emily and Adam Jr.
Adam's lying flat in bed a lot these days, but he has never stood taller to me, his family or the thousands of others he has
touched and helped. We're all fervently pulling and praying for him.
I've learned so much about life, love and laughter the past few months — thanks to Adam. Two of my many take-home lessons
are that we need to cherish every day at work and at home, and really pull together during times of adversity.
All of us are here for a limited time. If God calls Adam home sooner than we hope, we need to remember His plan is both beautiful
and mysterious. More will be revealed. It took decades for me to step back and see the true beauty of my mom's plan that show-and-tell
day — a plan that made no sense to me at the time, but one I now see brought Adam into my life.
Contact Marty at 216/706-3766 or e-mail at mwhitford@questex.com
